Goldfish Tea

She did this to me. I didn’t deserve it; we weren’t beefing. She wasn’t even paying attention to me until right before she spat a wad of cheese cracker slurry into my drink, and then went on with her day as if that were normal behavior for normal people to do.

Toddlers are a really interesting study in what feral humans with no impulse control or respect for social norms must be like. They’re sweet, and fun, and energetic, and just such weird little guys. There was no malice or spite in this action. It wasn’t premeditated; she didn’t even think about it. She simply found herself in a situation where she had a mouth full of mush and a cup in arm’s reach and couldn’t conceive of a universe where they weren’t meant to be combined somehow.